Sex & the Single Woman: Blinded by Love at First Sight


I have 20/20 vision. Well, pretty close to it. I have glasses that I wear for reading, but not all of the time. Oh, and I also had corrective surgery on my eyes when I was younger because one of them tended to wander. The point of all of this is that I consider myself to have pretty darn good vision.

But wait.

Time and time again I am plagued with a certain optical impairment—I am blind in relationships. I fail to see the flaws of the boy in question. He can be socially awkward, way too social, inexcusably cocky, completely wrapped up in his own life, undeniably immature… the list goes on and on. I am willing to overlook pretty much any undesirable quality in the guy I am dating. I don’t think I need to explain why this is a very, very bad thing.

I’m sure that I’m not the only woman with this problem. I mean, we’re females—overlooking the errors of men is what we do. But my question is: how do we fix this?

So far my issue hasn’t struck too hard, with the exception of the guy I dated who clearly thought enough of himself to spread the wealth and hook up with other girls. I’m worried, however, that some day I will look past a huge flaw and find myself dating a guy for all of the wrong reasons or end up really hurt.

Sure, the doctor could make my eyes look the same way, but sadly this is one problem he can’t fix with a scalpel or corrective lenses. So, ladies, what do we do?  How do we see the men we date for who they really are?