Married to Your Job?

By Patricia Morgan

smw - married to your jobYou are in trouble if you spend all weekend waiting for Monday. In fact, you may be suffering from workaholism.

Single Women and Workaholism

For our purpose we will define workaholism as a compulsion to work with little time devoted to personal relationships, rest, and recreation—other than booking an annual pedicure.

It seems single women may be more susceptible than married women to the work-your-head-off tendency.  In her book, “Married to the Job,” Ilene Philipson describes how the solo woman is vulnerable to lose sight of the rest of her life:

“Throughout history, women have married for economic survival and security.  Thus, when women today marry their jobs, a similar logic applies. In a world of rapid economic change, family disintegration, and the ongoing expectation that it is women’s responsibility to rear children, many, if not most, women look to the workplace for economic survival and security. Many are putting their hopes for fidelity and commitment through sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, in their employers. Jobs, not men, seem to offer more in the way of economic stability over the long haul.”

One Woman’s Experience

Suzy Wilkoff’s story fits perfectly with the job bride dynamic. She has a collection of awards and accomplishments from becoming the first and only female football recruiting coordinator at University of Miami. After graduating from college, she worked her way up the ladder at Delta Air Lines where, during the course of 12-year career stint, she advanced from working in reservations to an outside sales representative position with a multi-million dollar territory.

Then, after receiving heaps of job offers, she began working with one of the top golf instructors in the world. It was exciting driving around in a golf cart, working as an executive assistant. With the understanding that she would have to work some Saturdays but would have time off during the slow season, the hours increased and the money didn’t; she was working six days a week and being paid for five. She says, “I didn’t mind working Saturdays but wanted to be compensated.”

Between having high expectations for herself and living in Florida where employers can fire staff with no reason, Suzy allowed herself to work and work.  She explains, “I focused on the enjoyable parts of the job. I appreciated relationships with co-workers and customers. I tried to enjoy my personal time. I told myself, ‘I’m organized. I’m tough. I don’t cry. I don’t pout. I don’t complain. I can take a lot of stress and pressure.’”