Single Moms Stop Dating Wackos!
By Christina Eckert
It has happened yet another time. You, a sexy, smart single mom who considers herself pretty savvy meets a guy who seems perfect, and the two of you spend some really special times together. Things are just peachy and then out of the clear blue sky he drops some unforeseen relationship bomb. You thought you were hearing wedding bells, but looking back, it may have just been a warning siren. And just like that, as quickly as your bliss began, you find yourself single and absolutely mystified…and need of some single mom dating advice.
Does this scenario sound familiar? If your answer is a fed-up yes, you are not alone! These days nearly every single mom, or single woman for that matter has at least one romance war tale that sends shudders up her gal-pal’s spines during happy-hour story time. And after the stories come the inevitable questions: Why do my princes keep turning into frogs? What has happened to the opposite sex? And of course, What am I doing wrong?
Here are some answers. Chances are good that the problem really doesn’t have much to do with you at all. Society is changing every day, and we are seeing more and more Wackos wade their way into the dating pool. You have to be very careful when you go fishing for dates these days—you could end up catching a real stinker!
To be clear, the term Wacko is my catch-all word that defines the many unbalanced individuals who walk among us every day. Despite the tongue-in-cheek moniker, the subject of Wackos is a serious one.
Wackos of the very least offense are often greedy, arrogant, and self-centered. They like to control all situations and need to be the center of attention. They are like pesky mosquitoes, a minor irritation. Unfortunately, Wacko behavior can also be much worse. The most unsavory Wackos are prone to fits of vicious rage and may even be dangerous.
If you are one of the countless women who find themselves dating Wacko after Wacko, it is time for a change. There are good people out there, but if you’re too busy wasting your time with guys who engage in crash and burn relationships, you’ll never be available for real love. Wackos are often drawn to women who are willing to host them.
Women are very vulnerable to becoming Wacko hosts without even realizing it because so much of what makes a host is intrinsic to womankind.
To find out if you have been unconsciously attracting Wackos, ask yourself the following questions:
- Do strangers spill their life stories (often in embarrassingly graphic detail) within minutes of meeting me?
- Have I spent my life helping people, being a good friend, and more than periodically pulling the knife out of my back?
- Do I spend hours listening to “friends” and their problems only to be cut off when I try to share my own?
- Does my life lack balance?
Wackos like to take advantage of real and even perceived acts of hospitality. This applies to platonic relationships and certainly applies to romantic ones. Women who are viewed as pushovers are prime targets for Wackos. You may actually be attracting Wackos to your pool of available men. When these dysfunctional relationships go wrong, you find yourself taking all the blame. It’s time to stop.
Read on to learn about the various Wacko-types women often date and how to stop the cycle.
The Wishy-Washy Wacko. This type of Wacko is probably one of the most frustrating! He is quick to fall in love and even quicker to fall out of it. The wishy-washy Wacko will sing you sonnets after the first date and tell you how deeply smitten he is. You’ll actually begin to believe the hype. And then one day he vanishes into thin air, and explains himself only if you manage to corner him and demand an explanation. If you’re lucky, you will hear an excuse like “I got scared” or even “I always do this.” Wishy-washers really do believe they are in love at first sight. Unfortunately, this sentiment crashes and burns most of the time before your love can even get into the air—leaving you confused, hurt, and angry at being so casually dismissed.
The Smart Gal’s Defense: Let action speak louder than words with this one. Its okay to revel in the compliments and general sappiness; just don’t drown in it! Tell this emotionally stunted man-child that time will tell and to calm down before you contract diabetes from all the sugar spouting from his lips. If he hits the road after your coaching, that’s fine. You already knew he was a high-risk Wacko.
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