Are You Dating Charlie Sheen?

By Josie Brown

Unless you live on Mars (literally, as opposed to figuratively) I’m sure you’re aware of that very public emotional train wreck known as Charlie Sheen. He’s not bad looking, and beyond having the charisma and acting chops to deliver a line–for which, until very recently he got paid well for doing so–he is articulate enough to talk extemporaneously, so it doesn’t surprise me that he’s been married three times, or he’s one with the ladies…

Nope, Sheen’s problem is much larger than that.

A psychiatrist might point out that he has symptoms of some very serious mental health issues: his blithe ramblings, and his lack of emotional controls; and addictive behavior, both sexually (he has been known to frequent brothels, and keep company with porn stars) and with substance abuse (he has overdosed on cocaine).

On top of that, his issues with violence have been documented in the courts.

And sadly, he is fighting anyone who would want him to seek the help he needs, including friends and family.

Would you date Charlie Sheen?

“Of course not,” you say to yourself. “Unlike the two women he’s living with now, I have more self respect for myself..”.

But then you find yourself getting defensive when your close friends or concerned family members question your decision to stay in a relationship that leaves you sad, discouraged, and never sure of your place in it.

Well, guess what? You may already be dating someone very much like Charlie Sheen.

I’ve already listed some not-so-pretty traits of this man-boy behaving badly. Here are a few more that should have you running in the opposite direction:

1. He is verbally abusive.

If the man in your life makes little jokes at your expense–or for that matter yells or chastises you in public, he is doing so to prove he’s smarter than you. Well, he’s not. He’s just a creep.

2. He’s physically abusive.

A guy who has to threaten and hit to make his point is a bully, not a man–let alone half a man.

3. He has no consideration for the feelings of others.

If all he cares about are his needs and his feelings, he is too immature to be in a relationship.

4. He has no ethical filter.

If he doesn’t know right from wrong, he is wrong for you.

5. He is the last person you can count on to be supportive.

In the first place, he can barely support himself, let alone anyone else. In the second place, he wouldn’t even if he could. All he cares about is him, him, him.

6. He has addictions he can’t control.

Not only that, he doesn’t want to do so. And he doesn’t want to hear how much that is hurting you, him, or your relationship.

Now, ask yourself: do you really want this guy in your life? If you’re waffling, you’re a fool. You can do better. But the first step is to drop him like bad baggage–because that’s all he is in your life.

Do it. Today.


Josie Brown is’s Relationships Channel Editor. Her most recent novel, Secret Lives of Husbands and Wives, is in bookstores everywhere.

Her next novel, The Baby Planner, will be in bookstores on April 5, 2011. You can read an excerpt here…