Is It Okay to Cheat On Him?

By Josie Brown

You slipped up, and now you feel guilty about it.

In the heat of the moment, you let a man who wasn’t your significant other get intimate with you.

Blame it on Rio, or any other place with a let-it-all-hang-out ambiance, but the fact remains:

Having given into temptation, you no longer feel comfortable around the man who once made you so happy.

Well, you’re not alone.

According to a recent survey by Wet, a manufacturer of intimacy products, nearly half of respondents (45%) admitted that they’ve cheated on a significant other.

In fact, 68% of respondents have hooked up with someone who they knew was in a relationship; Low and behold, 48% of respondents admitted that the idea of having a secret affair turns them on.

What exactly constitutes cheating? According to more than one third of respondents (34%),  kissing someone other than their partner doesn’t make the cut.

Perhaps a bigger question–unfortunately not on this survey–should be: Why did you cheat in the first place?

Here are some possible reasons:

1. You and your significant other haven’t been on the same wavelength lately.
He’s says up, you say down. Or maybe you don’t say anything at all to each other. If you aren’t communicating, you aren’t working through your issues–and you may be working your way out of each others’ lives.

2. You fight over every little thing.
It could be the way he brushes his teeth, or the way you chew your food. Well, guess what, it’s not all those silly idiosyncrasies that are coming between you. More than likely, it’s something bigger that neither of you has found the nerve to discuss.

3.  You can’t remember the last time you two made love.
All humans need sexual intimacy. If things aren’t touchy-feely between you, the temptation to stray is understandable–for both of you.

In order to be tempted, you’ve got to first feel that you’re missing out on something. Are you willing to take the risk of losing him? If so, then he is not the right guy at this time in your life–and you certainly aren’t the right girl for him, either.

However, if you truly feel that he deserves the same appreciation and respect that you’d want from him, then it’s time you get to the bottom of your unhappiness–before it ruins what might be the best relationship you’ll ever have.


Josie Brown is’s Relationships Channel Editor. Her most recent novel, Secret Lives of Husbands and Wives, is in bookstores everywhere.

Her next novel, The Baby Planner, will be in bookstores on April 5, 2011. You can read an excerpt here…

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