Don’t Let Mr. Wrong Keep You from Finding Mr. Right

By Martin Brown and Josie Brown

notebook2There’s a good chance if you’re a single women over the age of 21, you’ve had a few bad experiences with some not-so-nice Mr. Wrongs.

Needless to say, those past experiences have made you more than just a little gun-shy—which is why some totally innocuous remark from a potential Mr. Right brings back a flood of memories (nightmares, really) of your life with He Who You Wish You Could Forget Forever.

Who can blame you? The last thing you want is to go through those experiences again!

Well, guess what? You won’t.

This is assured by one simple fact:

You’re dead-set determination to stay away from guys who will hurt you.

Now, here’s the hard trick:

You have to learn to trust your instincts that, this time around, you’ve made a better choice.

If you don’t think that a few too many Mr. Wrongs can blind you from seeing the charms of your Mr. Right, well it’s time to think again.

 

To help you realize that he’s not Mr. Wrong’s evil twin, ask yourself these four questions before you walk away from this new relationship:

 

1. Is this a pattern of action, or just an anomaly?

2. Is he aware of any of your previous issues with Mr. Wrong?

3. Have you had a heart-to-heart with him as to what actions of his concern you?

4. Having heard you, does he continue going down the same path?

Unless you can answer “No” to all of these, you owe him—and yourself—another shot at love.

Granted, he’ll have his own issues. And yes, they will come up in your relationship. The great news here, however, is that unlike Mr. Wrong, you and he will learn to discuss them, and work through them together and keep your new relationship on track—

Even when the ghosts of past Mr. Wrongs continue to haunt you.

(Photo: from the movie The Notebook, in which a wrong choice doesn’t stop Rachel Adams’ character from making the right one eventually.)

 

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CIGFMR180Excerpted from THE COMPLETE IDIOT’S GUIDE TO FINDING MR. RIGHT, the perfect self-help manual for your BFF (…okay, and for you, too). Authors Martin Brown and Josie Brown are SingleMindedWomen.com’s Health and Relationships channel editors, respectively.

Josie is also the author of two novels: IMPOSSIBLY TONGUE-TIED, and TRUE HOLLYWOOD LIES. Look for Josie’s third novel, SECRET LIVES OF HUSBANDS AND WIVES, in bookstores August 2010.

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