Comments on: What’s So Horrible About Needing a Man?

By: chrisb

chrisb — Tue, 01 Sep 2009 02:28:04 +0000

There is nothing wrong with wanting a man in your life. But in my experience, having the wrong man is far worse than being alone. I remember talking to a girlfriend and saying “I’d rather be alone than with the wrong man” and a big bell went off in my head. I went home and broke up with my boyfriend at the time — one of the best things I ever did!
I don’t NEED a man. I like to have a man and yes, I crave intimacy, but I don’t NEED a man to be happy.

By: modernsinglemom

modernsinglemom — Fri, 28 Aug 2009 03:36:45 +0000

I’ll be more then HAPPY to admit, I need a romantic partner. I think it is important to be honest with our true needs and desires and not be concerned with what we “should” say . Yes, we are very strong minded and capable women, but I also believe God designed us to be a partner.

By: Singletude

Singletude — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 06:08:39 +0000

Even though I’m really looking forward to Cove’s documentary, I was disappointed with this article. Promoting the idea that anyone–male or female–NEEDS a romantic partner or spouse suggests that it’s impossible to be a happy, fully realized individual on one’s own. That’s just not so. I like to recommend Dr. Bella DePaulo’s book, Singled Out, as a superb source of research on singles that debunks many of the myths about the so-called benefits of marriage. It turns out many of them have been fabricated.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting a romantic relationship. But when you “need” one, you’re saying that you’re not okay as you are. Well, we are all okay as we are. We were all born into this world single, and we will all leave it the same way. Those who join us on the journey, whether spouses, other family members, or friends, are welcome additions for many, but we don’t NEED any particular individual in order to have a fulfilling life. It’s especially frustrating to see the spousal role elevated above all others again. If we “need” romantic partners, then we “need” friends, parents, siblings, aunts & uncles, nieces & nephews, cousins, co-workers, and neighbors just as much.

Being single isn’t necessarily a stage. For a growing number of women, it’s how they’ll spend their lives. To suggest that they all “need” men in order to make the most of their time on earth does a great disservice to them and their contributions to society.