Q&A with John Gray: “He Stares at Other Women.”
By John Gray
Dear John, I recently had my breast implants removed because I came to believe that they were dangerous to my health. When my boyfriend and I first met and fell in love, I did not have implants, so I know he was attracted to me, and my breast size was not an issue. Lately, however, he can’t seem to get enough of looking at women who have very large breasts. Okay, I can understand when it’s some fantasy or celebrity – like his obsession with Scarlett Johansson. But he stares at total strangers, too! I don’t think all men have a need for staring this way, or do they?
—Tori L., Carlsbad, NM
Many men don’t stare. Still, I’m sure you realize that most men are naturally attracted to that part of a woman’s anatomy, and many will merely glance in appreciation. You should also consider the possibility that your own situation may have made you more sensitive to this issue. Whatever the case,you should never be made to feel uncomfortable by another’s stare, whether is directed at you or someone else.
Your boyfriend may not realize he is staring, so it’s important that you communicate your feelings to him. Let him know that, while he is with you, you won’t mind an occasional glance, but staring at these women is not okay. Explain to him that, when he stares at these women, he makes you feel as if you are not good enough for him. He can then reassure you that you are indeed perfect for him by making a real effort to keep his eyes to himself.
John Gray is the author of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. the
number one best-selling relationship book of the last decade. In the
past ten years, over 30 million Mars and Venus books have been sold in
over 40 languages throughout the world. His latest book is Mars and Venus Collide: Improving Relationships While Understanding How Men and Women Cope with Stress. Check out John’s website: www.MarsVenusLiving.com
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