SMW Horoscope for December 2008
By Carresse Du Barry
Aires: What has you in the doldrums isn’t this lousy economy or even your gal pal’s incessant grumbling over her ambivalent boyfriend. It’s your own issues with men. Time to face facts: They’re half the population. Make love, not war.
Taurus: Don’t be scared. All that will happen this month, all that hard work over these past few months, is going to pay off in some really big dividends. Just keep doin’ what you’re doin’—and trust the Fates to follow through.
Gemini: Cha-ching! You’ve hit the jackpot this time. No, seriously. So, don’t do what you normally do: you know, spend it all in one place. Lean times are a’comin’ by golly, and you’ll need to prepare for the worst case scenario. Every li’l dollar counts…
Cancer: Lately your culinary skills leave a lto to be desired. As with all things, practice makes perfect. Don’t worry about a few burnt pies. When you perfect your repertoire, you’ll get the accolaides you deserve.
Leo: Love on the rocks. No, it doesn’t mean he wants to break up with you, but that you can expect a little bauble to come your way. (Very little. It’s the economy, stupid.)
Virgo: Got the blues? Cheer up, buttercup! There isn’t any amount of slush to keep your holiday from being heavenly. Don’t believe me? Go sit and Santa’s lap. And if you whisper in his ear, you’ll be surprised what he whispers back. (Yes, it will make you SMILE…)
Libra: So who’s your daddy? Oh yeah? That’s what you think. Turns out he’s playing house with some other l’il lady. Kick him out of your house, like, NOW. No regrets.
Scorpio: It’s just a case of mistaken identity. He thought you were someone he didn’t want to know. You have this month to convince him otherwise, so get cracking! You’ll be glad he did, and he’ll be glad you changed his mind for him.
Saggitarius: You want to rekindle the passion with an old flame. Don’t bother! No matter what he says, he’s talking out of both sides of his mouth—and neither side is telling the truth, so close both ears (“LALALALALA…”) and move on.
Capricorn: It’s never to late to make amends, to put right what you made cockeyed with those few white lies. Yes, they can take the truth—as long as you tell it like it is. Just the fact, m’am.
Aquarius: It’s not what you say, but how you say it. Try nice and polite. Not to be trite, but it’s true that you’ll catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. Stay sweet, no matter how sour you feel getting your point across.
Pisces: If you’ve decided to forgo the New Years resolution, you may want to reconsider that stance. Next year will be a doozie, and you’ll need all the help you can get—from whatever source you can take it. Ask and ye shall receive…