Spice of Life / The Menage-a-Trois: Is Three Company?

By Josie Brown

Young happy smiling attractive hugging couple and woman lookingMr. Right Now has come to you with a proposition: Want to help him fulfill his ultimate fantasy?

How can you say no?

But hey, not so quick! Turns out you’re not his only dream girl. If you agree, you get the honor of sharing him. And he’s sharing you, too—with her.

Is that what this relationship is all about?

It is, if…

1. You’re only in it for the sex.
Love and lust are totally different emotions. If you’re looking for a deeper commitment with—or from—this guy, it’s time to face facts: he’s only there for the sex. If that works for you too, then perhaps the more will make it merrier…

2. You’ve got an “I’ll try anything once” attitude about sex.
This column celebrates the fact that variety—specifically in bed—is the spice of life. That said, if you’ve never experienced a threesome, the opportunity has now presented itself. It worked for Anais Nin and Henry and June Miller. Go for it—or feel free to just go home.

3. You’re not the jealous type.
If, by your nature, you spit nails and turn pea green with envy when another woman gives your guy the once-over, then this is certainly not going to be your cuppa. Scratching out the eyes of your new bedmate isn’t foreplay in anyone’s book.

4. You’re there for you—not for him.
Being in the moment is the true form of total self-indulgence. If you’re angsting over impressing him by saying yes—and all the while hating every moment of it, then you’re not there for the one right reason, and certainly there for all the wrong reasons.

5. You’re not afraid of walking away if it doesn’t feel right.
At any point during sex play if you that you’re just not into what’s happening—worse yet, if you’re just plain bored, call it a night.

Better yet, call the best two lovers you ever had and suggest a man sandwich. Now, that’s the true meaning of a menage-a-trois.

More SMW Relationship Advice

The Spice of Life: Rethinking Your Mile High Club Hijinks

The Spice of Life: The M Word. (No, Not “Men,” but “Masturbation”)

The Spice of Life: Spank Me, Make Me Write Bad Checks…