Ladies, Would You Date A Fat Man?

By Martin Brown

In a recent British survey, forty-three percent of adult males said they hadn’t seen their penises in the last two years without looking in a mirror or bending over, while another 16 percent were unable to remember the last time they saw it at all.

But at that point, would they really want to?

More importantly, would their girlfriends want to see it?

From the research of 2,000 men it was easy to see why so many British men were in such a poor state of health. Don’t forget of course that our homegrown American lads are not all so different from their British cousins when it comes to their own issues of health and obesity. Some of the study’s other results included:

Further, as the report points out, it would appear that these tubby British males would consider doing something about their weight only if certain dire results occurred from their excess weight, such as:

  • 52% would lose weight if they were constantly embarrassed about the way they looked
  • 36% would only lose weight if they grew male boobs (Moobs! in Seinfeldian terminology)
  • 52% would only lose weight if they received a serious health warning from their doctor
  • 35% would take action if they were unable to have sex for an extended period of time
  • 25 % would shed the pounds after consistent nagging from their partner
  • 21% would lose weight if they were unable to reach down and tie their shoe laces.

It really doesn’t matter what side of the pond you are in, we have plenty of fat men in America as well. And from the standpoint of helping get these men past their problems: Would you tell a guy whose weight and alcohol intake was out of control that it was time to “shape-up,” or ship out?

Men are deeply effected by what women think of their appearance. Be it casual friends to intimate partners, the closer the relationship, the more likely a man is to be concerned about how his appearance and his behavior is perceived.

In countless ways, women have been extending the longevity of men. Women are far more likely than men to seek medical advice for a potential health threat. More likely to have preventative procedures physicals, mammography, pap smears and more. Men, as you can see in this survey, prefer to ignore health concerns, and much like a top will simply keep spinning until they topple over.

To the question: Would you date a fat man, let alone one with a drinking problem?

Most women would likely answer, “No!” But in truth the man you started out with is often not the man you wind up with. And many women find that reasonably thin, more often than not sober man, changing for the worst before their disappointed eyes. As a woman, you should never underestimate your ability to change a man and his neglectful ways. Much of how he sees himself is a reflection of how you see him.

If you insist that he do better, with surprising consistency a man will respond.

Often a woman’s success hinges on an effective blend of persistence and patience. In the end, it’s your choice as to whether you date a fat man with a drinking problem or not. Some men are simply bound and determined to drive their health over the edge. That doesn’t mean you need to be sitting in the passenger seat as they take the plunge. It’s not a problem you created, but hopefully it’s a problem you can help to fix.


Martin Brown is the Heath Channel Editor for, and co-author of The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Finding Mr. Right.

His most recent book, Fit in 50 Days: Creating the Habits that Will Keep You Lean for Life, is available now.

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